Friday, November 10, 2023

How a ‘ Serene’ place could be ‘Haunting’ for some !


 It was a dead end. We stood in the middle of nowhere as the Gps of our car (uber) mistook the place as our destination. There was no sign of life. The driver looked around bewildered, as he found nothing indicating where to proceed. I was on my way to attend a conference.

Without loosing much time; I phoned my colleague who rushed to pick me up. We got lost as we took the wrong turning and the place was at a stone’s throw away from the deserted place.

Finally, when I arrived where the conference was being held, for once, I thought I had reached my home state, Kerala. It had been a year since I was pining for my native place. I was living in Bangalore, then. The hustle and bustle of the city had literally started to take a toll on me. And there were no friends and families within the reach.


I could unwind with some greenery around. But as I lived amidst a food hub, the place was always abuzz with activities. I sought solace in a church nearby, during the evenings.


Courtesy: Visthar website



Sprawled over six acres of land with mango trees and many others, the names of which I am not familiar with, the place was a great solace to me. Amidst them, here and there, just like islands stood small houses with tiled roofs. It reminded me of childhood days before the onslaught of technology. The knowledge that I could stay in one of them just cheered me up.


There was a gigantic well in the middle the steps of which led to its bottom. And you could see it as there was no water in it. No doubt, I was quickly taken by its beauty, but it gave me the chills too.


 I found out later that the well could have a monstrous face with water to its brim as one of my colleagues showed me one such photograph. The mouth of the well was too wide that I felt it could devour you if you weren’t careful.




During the recess, I found many of my colleagues going down the steps with much ease and I watched them with wide eyes as I could go only a few steps. I was scared that the weaver ants on the steps would bite me and I would fall down.


Besides, though not intentionally, the conversation started to revolve around deaths by falling into huge wells. It might have been a sheer coincidence as I happened to notice Rajkumar, one of my colleagues intently listening to our conversation. Since he had come from Bellary (a major city in the state of Karnataka) which is more than five hours away, he was staying in Visthar for three days.


It was the time I was seriously thinking about travel blogging and even rejigged one of my blogs for it. But I hadn’t mustered the courage to go to far away places (I still haven’t).  So, a shout out to all those travellers and travel bloggers out there, I hold you in high esteem…


Hence, I thought of going there again and spend a few days to write about it.


To throw more light about the place, Visthar in Bangalore is a secular civil society organisation committed to social justice and peace.  The environmental consciousness had made them design their campus to be an Eco – sanctuary.


The knowledge that I could spend a few days there at a reasonable price made my decision firm to come back which never happened. But as I write this, I regret it deeply as my whole being wanted to be there away from all the mundanities of life.


 It was almost dark when the first day of our conference ended. The place suddenly had an eerie feeling about it. I felt like predators lurking in the dark, ready to pounce upon its prey when the time comes. But that made the place all the more exciting.

Though the next day began with a positive note, Rajkumar appeared to be tired like a withered flower. The Rajkumar I knew was a different person. With a strong physique, he always appeared ready to take the bull by its horns.


It was then I came to know that something strange happened in his room, the previous night. Upon coaxing, he took me and one of my colleagues to his room.


Though the room was big, the two wooden cots with a mosquito net frame and a large almirah made it a bit cluttered. The cots were put one after the other. Surprisingly, neat and tidy bathroom appeared larger than the room. As the building stood independent of each other, even you scream, through the fog, it would not reach anybody.


I saw a blanket lying near to the second cot. It was on the first he slept, the other night.


And he started narrating the incident. It was around 11.30 pm. He tucked himself in a blanket and was slowly slipping into sleep when he felt that someone was trying to pull the blanket off from him.


When he opened his eyes, he couldn’t see anybody but the blanket was lying on the floor.


He woke up, checked the bathroom and the large almirah. There was nobody.  “But I felt a presence,” he said with fear still lingering in his eyes.


Much to his dismay, it occurred several times and he tried calling his colleagues but to no avail. Though he opened the door, out of fear, he couldn’t see anything through the fog.


He was petrified to the core that he shrunk himself into one of the corners of his room and did not remember when he dozed off.


The next morning when Rajkumar woke up his jeans, which was hung on the mosquito net frame was lying outside the door.


My colleague was making faces as if Rajkumar was telling a blatant lie. But I couldn’t think of it as such. I asked him to recount his experience during the conference. He gently refused, saying people wouldn’t believe him.


“I knew what I went through last night. But If I narrate my experience, I would be a laughing stock among them.”


He is right. Our experiences, thoughts, feelings are our own. And it can’t be expected that others too might accept them the way we experience.


” Have you come across any such experiences in your life?”


Thursday, November 9, 2023

A 5 year old write up and a ' Gentle Reminder for me


I call myself ' His' Prodigal Daughter

 My life had hit rock bottom. It had happened several times, but this time, it was bad …thoroughly bad and I stood groping in the dark thinking I might not even survive it.


And that was scary.


My parents came to my rescue and pampered me as if I were their two year old daughter. They were bewildered as they never saw me absolutely befuddled. I was their bold daughter who not only ventured out seeking new pastures, but made it on her own.


Things were drastically different a year ago. I was a like a broken glass, frantically trying to fix the fragmented pieces… But there were more cracks appearing and the pieces were falling apart.


When nothing is going your way, the only resort is to turn to God and I was no different. Though I called myself a believer, I had never been a practicing Christian.


To my surprise, one evening, I was there in the church, attending Holy Mass, weeping and tearing my heart out.


Fortunately, I never asked ‘Him’ the question ‘Why me’. I should say, I never dared to ask it since I knew my life was much better than so many people around me.


But why do I get hurt all the time? This question nagged me and I badly wanted an answer. And yes, there are answers. Getting those are a process and you have to live through it.


If you ask me ‘do you enjoy it?’ Yes, by all means.

Is it tough? Of course

Do you think you will get through it? I believe ‘ Yes’


Before, I proceed; let me tell you this is not a blog which has a religious hue. I just want to share my experience with God. There are no intermediaries between me and him. Just us…and that’s so beautiful, soulful, tranquil…


But the blog is not confined to that alone, but all those beautiful experience that followed suit as part of my tryst with my Lord.


I call myself his ‘Prodigal Daughter’. I have been away and now I have come back.


2019 has been eventful and 2020 is going to be mine.


With loads of love,

Shalet Jimmy


 


 


Tuesday, November 7, 2023

In between ‘Planning’ happens Life….

 


Sometimes you feel like doing a lot of things.

And if you have attended one of those capacity building conferences, you will definitely decide to plan your each step.

For the expert says: “the goal will continue to remain distant unless you plan.”

Thoroughly motivated, I decide to plan…

I shut myself away from everything and I plan…

I make daily planner, weekly planner, monthly planner, annual planner and many other planners on my drive and forget most of the planners barring the basic ones.

I feel as if I am almost there.

Then one fine morning, I find myself sitting and blinking at the wall, doing nothing.

After a couple of days, I look at my petrified self and say “Why don’t you just get out of the house and get some fresh air.”

“Yes, you’re right, ” I say.

Soon, I get out of the house, attend the evening mass.

After that, I immerse myself in the all pervading silence of the church.

I light candles.

Have my little conversation with the Jewish Carpenter.

Then sit under the shade of a large Mango tree in the compound of the church.

Walk home on a well lit road.

Sometimes, I look at the sky.

And pass a flower shop effusing the fragrance of jasmine flowers.

Come back and make dinner.

Read a few pages, type a blog post and pitch a new story idea.

And there I am… fast asleep.

Next morning, I wake up, pray and make my bed.

Then I tick mark the things I did the previous night, holding a cup of brewing coffee in the other hand.

And I realise these little pleasures which we conveniently brush aside while planning a larger picture makes real life.

- Shalet Jimmy💖

 I started blogging way back in 2008. It was a time I knew nothing but writing. I was clueless regarding the technical know how on how to handle a blog. Still I wrote and made friends. Then after a few years, people started migrating to wordpress and I could feel the connection that bound us slowly getting severed. 

Now I am sitting in front of the laptop clueless on what to write.

Saturday, October 28, 2023

Hey!!

  Hey!!! I am not sure whether this is a come back or not. I want to be here sharing so many things with you. But I don’t know whether I can do that successfully. When I started blogging in 2008, there was a full fledged blogger community. Though most of us were sitting apart many miles away from each other there was a connection that did bind us together…hmm…kind of personal connection. 

We came together because we shared the passion for writing and telling our own stories. Unfortunately, gone are those days of such a virtual camaraderie…Now everything has become so business like and lost that personal touch which made me shut this blogging world.

I have been following certain blogs. After coming back, I could see that like me, they haven’t blogged for years. Now that I am here, I feel like I am in a dark tunnel, alone without knowing what to look and where to turn…


There’re no frogs in this pond – Thavalayillakkulam

Sometimes, it’s the stories behind certain places that leaves an indelible impression on your mind. I love to hear such stories. And this is...